Essay Grading Thoughts...Oh, and Zombies are Running the International Space Station, Did You Know?

So I'm sitting here grading 9 weeks assessment essays, eating candy corn by the handful and chugging Dr. Pepper to stay awake. (Don't judge, you know you've been there, too!)

And these responses are just killing me, for a variety of reasons. Parents really just don't understand how their child's essay affects us, and that doesn't even count the fact that I have 60 to grade!

Students were asked to write an essay stating whether they would rather go on a field trip to a museum or have an astronaut come speak to the class.

Let me share a few with you:

Student #1
[internal thought: If I bang my face on the keyboard a few times, she'll never notice, right?] Produced result: asdofijweaoifj (repeat ad nauseum for a page).

Student #2
I think we should go on a field trip to visit an astronaut because I've always wanted to go to the moon!

Student #3
I don't like Science. (Yes, ladies and gentlemen. That was the extent of this student's essay.)

Student #4
We should visit a museum because all astronauts are dead anyways. (Oops, sorry astronauts. Guess there's something someone forgot to tell the rest of us. Or you. By the way, did you know there are now zombies running the International Space Station?)

What are your favorite student essay responses?


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